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simonov

The best site on the entire interwebs

Before I get to the SGMDF-related aspects of this post (state parks), I would like to endorse the Rip-off Report site as the ichiban numero uno absolute best site on the entire interwebs, bar none.  It is a black hole for America's most retarded idiots, and I have wasted many hours during the week since I discovered the site enjoying barely literate rants about rip-offs and other grave human rights violations.

Anyway, I decided that this report offered an opportunity to bring this excellent site to the attention of the SGMDF brain trust.  It combines some of the best elements of the typical Rip-off Report (bizarre spelling, addled logic) with a topical and newsworthy warning about the very real dangers that lurk in our state parks as well as the state parks in New Mexico.

For your enjoyment and edification, I reproduce it here in its entirety:

Quote:

Oliver Lee Memorial State Park
Phone:  505-437-8284
409 Dog Canyon Road
Alamogordo, New Mexico, 88310

Reported By
ED
Tempe, Arizona

WE WERE NIN ALAMOGODO NM AND SAW THIS STATE PARK FROM THE HIGHWAY.

MY WIFE AND I DECIDED TO SEE WHAT IT WAS ALL ABOUT. IT WAS ALSO LISTED IN OUR ROAD ATLAS.

WHEN WE DROVE UP THE DRIVEWAY WE SAW A BOX AND A SIGN THAT INFORMS VISITORS THAT THE FEE MUST BE PAID AND PLACED INTO THIS BOX, BEFORE PARK ENTRY.

THEN STATEING THAT WE FILL OUT A TRIPLICATE RECEIPT AND $4.00 BE PLACED ITO AN ENVELOPE ATTACHED TO THIS FORM AND ONE COPY BE PLACED ON THE WINDOW OF THE CAR AND THE OTHER KEPT ON ONES PERSON.

ALSO THE SIGN STATED THAT IF CAUGHT IN THE PARK WITHOUT THIS RECEIPT A TEN-DOLLAR FINE WOULD BE ENFORCED.

WE PAID THE 4.00 THEN PROCEEDED TO THE VISITORS CENTER WHICH WAS A MERE 100 YDS UP THE ROAD AND AROUND A CURVE, NOT VISIBLE FROM THE ENTRANCE.

ON ENTRY INTO THE VISITORS CENTER THERE WAS A HUGE SIGH DISCLAIMING WARNING THAT THERE ARE MANY TYPES OF SNAKES ON THE PATH AND THEY ALSO SUGEST THAT ONE WARE HIGH BOOTS AND BE CAREFUL.

WE FOUND THAT THE PATH IS ONLY 3 FT WIDE WITH MANY PLACES FOR SNAKES TO HIDE FROM THE SUN. ROCKS BUSHSES ETC.

THERE IS ALSO A DROP OF 30 FT ON ONE SIDE WITH NO RAILING. IF ONE WAS TO BE STARTLED THEY COULD FALL AND BE FATALY INJURED.

WE COULD NOT FIGURE OUT WHY WE HAD TO PLACE THIS RECEIPT ON OUR CAR THERE WAS NO PLACE TO DRIVE AND WE WALKED UP THE PATH NO MORE THAN 10 FEET AND DECIDED IT WAS NOT WORTH THE AGRIVATION AND LEFT.

BEING IN BUSSINESS FOR 37 SEVEN YEARS I FEEL THAT A PERSON SHOULD BE INFORMED OF THIS BEFORE BEING FLEECED OF 4.00 DOLLARS.

THE 4.00 IS NOT MUCH AND I WAS MORE THAN WILLING TO PAY THE PRICE BUT PRINCIPAL DICTATES THAT I SHOULD HAVE BEEN GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE A CALL ON WETHER MY WIFE AND I WOULD WANT TO VENTURE INTO THE PARK WITH THE PREVAILING DANGERS.

FOR A STATE PARK TO PRACTICE DECEPTIVE PRACTICES USSUALLY DONE BY DECIETFUL SHAM AND SCAM TYPE ARTISTS.

A STATE PARK OF THE UNITED STATES SHOULD BE MORE DISCRETE AND PRACTICE FAIR BUSINESS.

THIS IS UNBECOMING OF A STATE OF THE UNITED STATES.

CC. TO DEPARTMENT OF INTERIOR
RIPOFFREPORT.COM (ON THE INTERNET)


There are additional comments at the report link.

WARNING: That site is crawling with trolls (I am considering registering a troll moniker myself), but I am pretty sure this particular report is the real thing.  There is no internet troll alive who can fake the crazy spelling so well.
Bill

A little like Rosanne Rosana Dana from Saturday night Live.  Hillarious! Laughing
Taco

Shocked
phydeux

"One Step Beyond the Idiots on Ripoff Report":

Yep, there's some crazy stuff on ROR, but here's my true story on the idiots that believe everything they read on it:

There's some gal back east who posted a vile, vindictive report about her deadbeat, drug-addicted boyfriend who got her pregnant and now won't pay child support.  You can derive that the creep is 20-30 years old (I'm 50+), but there's no picture of the dude, no address (except he live on the east coast and works in construction), no nothing.  And that deadbeat has the same name as me!

Who's the idiot here who believes this stuff?  The minimium wage folks in personnel departments who do background searches by putting my name into their browsers, find this crap, believe its me, then ask me about it at follow-up job interviews!  Wonder how many jobs I've gotten turned away from because of this crap.
Taco

Good God! At least you can set 'em straight since they ask, right?

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